I Have a summary of Desirable Traits. Just why is it problematic for ladies to Commit?

Reader matter:

Me: 46 years old, African-American male, specialist profession, property owner, beautiful, 20-year-old boy. We date outside of my competition. Im in very good shape.

It seems just as much as women want a loyal relationship, they don’t wanna invest in me. I actually do have a “list” of desirable qualities — appealing, in a position to resolve the woman finances, a social or nondrinker and someone who is actually prepared and capable take a trip and carry out acts.

Just why is it burdensome for females to dedicate as I give outward signs of wanting to be in a committed union?

-Mark (California)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear Mark,

Certainly, unnecessary women can be behaving like men (or how they THINK males act) and therefore are preventing commitment. That being said, I will reveal you can still find much more women who want a protected accessory than not.

I am wanting to know precisely why you may appear as attracted to ladies who prevent a solid connection. Could this be your option in targets?

My tip is to try to speak with females whom you might not initially end up being keen on to discover in the event that you loosen up for them. Sometimes all of our inability to find a secure relationship relates to the concerns of abandonment.

Put differently, we decided on lovers exactly who cannot get close to shield you from becoming “dangerously” close and exposure abandonment.

Decide to try matchmaking the kind of individual you’ve never, actually ever dated before. Go-slow. And watch your emotions on the way.

Do you ever come to be quickly jealous, need control the woman time or wish to close the offer too fast? The trick is always to contain yourself and quell your anxieties.

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